I’m Perfectly Lonely

Loneliness is a choice. Being alone is not a choice.

When I want peace and quiet, I prefer to be lonely. I don’t have to be sad to be lonely. I wouldn’t exactly say I’m an introvert, but I am definitely not an extrovert. I love socializing and talking to others but one some days, I would just prefer to be silent. That doesn’t mean I’m upset. I just want time for myself to think. Because that’s the way I want it.

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When I am alone, however, it may feel lonely and quiet, but it’s also a little frightening for me. Sometimes when I’m alone, I do want to talk to others. But I can’t because I’m alone. Not necessarily alone with people in the room, but alone drowning in my own thoughts, too distant from others, too far to reach out. Being alone can be figurative too. Being alone can mean being distant from everyone.

It’s like how in the Box Man The Box Man by Barbara Lazear Ascher almost seems as if he’s the knowledgeable one, he’s gone through not being lonely to being alone, and understands that this thing we’re going through called “life” is a “solo voyage”. We are meant to be the chess pieces of our own game, except we move ourselves.

Crookshanks 🙂

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